Who Won The War?
by FirstMateBunny
Summary: Emmett decides to erm... politely inform Jasper who won the war.
1. Chapter 1

Edward smirked when he heard what was going through Emmett's head. _The North won the war. The North won the war._ Emmett chanted in his mind. Today was definitely going to be an interesting day in the Cullen household.

Running as fast as he could down the stairs he almost ran into Bella. "Hello love," Edward said scooping his fiancée into his arms. "You could not have picked a better time to come around." Edward laughed and walked at a human pace to the living room in search of Alice.

When he didn't find her there he followed her thoughts out into the yard. There Alice was collapsed on the ground in fits of laughter. Bella grew confused. "What's going on?" She asked, carefully climbing out of Edwards arms. Alice began trying to explain but couldn't stop laughing long enough to form a coherent sentence.

Edward ignored her and looked to his favourite sister. "Wait," he said interrupting her playback of the vision. "If you saw _that_ why aren't you worried?"

Alice glared from her position on the ground. "If you didn't interrupt me then you would have seen _this_." The pixie like vampire played the end of her vision in her mind and let out a loud peal of laughter.

Edward slowly began to laugh himself. "So _that's _his plan? Oh, this is going to be good." Then Alice stopped to consider things.

"Edward you should take Bella away now," she said.

"Wh…" Then it dawned on him. "Oh, right. C'mon love, let's get you home."

Bella pushed his cold hands away. "No Edward. I want you to tell me what's going on and I want you to tell me _NOW_!" Edward didn't even get a chance to begin because Emmett waltzed out the door whistling along with the voice in his head.

It was official. Emmett was going to _politely _inform Jasper that the North won the war.

***

"Jasper's coming," Alice muttered. Edward did the only thing he could think of as Emmett poured gasoline on the lawn. He stood protectively in front of Bella and stayed there.

Alice joined him and together they blocked Bella from what would soon be the wrath of Jasper Whitlock Hale.

***

Jasper ran as fast as he could towards the white house in the middle of the woods. He smelled gasoline. And when you lived with Emmett that was never a good thing.

He hurtled to a stop when half of the lawn burst into flame. He looked first to Alice and Edward who stood purposefully in front of Bella his eyes then flicked suspiciously to the space where he had seen Emmett disappear from.

Jasper felt extreme confusion from Bella and caution (not to mention Edwards's protectiveness for Bella) from Alice and Edward.

Reading Alice's face like an open book he turned sharply to look at the fire.

Spelled out in flame were the words _The North won the war!_

**Look out for the next chapter. It contains Jasper's revenge. Heh heh heh.**


	2. Chapter 2

Jasper's POV

I glared at Edward and Alice. Both knew I'd never hurt them but both also knew that I needed revenge for not-so-subtle reminder about the Civil War. Suddenly Alice smiled. She was by my side in less than a second. "Jazz you're brilliant!" She cried throwing her arms around my neck.

I smirked and began to refine my plan. Emmett was _so_ going to pay!

***

With Emmett

Emmett flew through the trees and stopped at Bella's house. Dangit Charlie was home. "Oh well," Emmett said to himself. "Maybe Charlie will let me hide here. And if I call Jacob and ask him to do a favour for Bella and protect me then I'll be safe." He chuckled to himself and soon that chuckle became a deranged maniacal laugh.

The door to Bella's house flew open and Charlie stepped out. "Who's there?" He yelled into the empty yard. Emmett took a cautious step forward when he heard Bella talking.

Edward's laugh echoed in the trees as the couple came into view. Edward was giving Bella a piggyback ride home. "Oh, it's just you kids," Charlie said gruffly.

"Hey dad, you didn't happen to see Emmett did you?" Concern made itself visible on Bella's face. Emmett, deciding that he didn't want to stay in the forest anymore, walked casually across the road.

"Hiya!" Emmett boomed. "Uh, Bella, Chief Swan, I was uh, wondering if I could maybe hide in your house for a widdle while?" He asked hopefully, batting his eyelashes at Bella and her father. Edward laughed.

"Don't worry Em, Jazz isn't mad," he laughed. Bella giggled.

"Yeah Emmy, Jazzy isn't _that _mad." She fell off Edwards back because of her laughter.

"Well," Emmett said, slightly put out. "What is he then?" He looked at the ground and moved a stone back and forth with his foot.

"Bella, love, are you alright?" Edward asked trying to help her off the ground. She nodded breathlessly. "Emmett," he sighed turning to his favourite brother. "Emmett Jasper has decided to uh, postpone his revenge for another day. I believe his exact words were: '_I'll get him another day. That way he'll be looking over his shoulder for the next __**decade**__!_' So bro, you've got nothing to worry about."

Emmett released the breath he didn't need to hold. "Well, that's okay then. Guess I won't need to hide out here or in La Push after all." Edward and Bella gaped as Emmett turned back to the forest and disappeared inside.

***

Back at the Cullen's House

Alice and Jacob sat snickering in a corner and Jasper was telling Esme and Carlisle the final plan. "So d'you think it'll work?" Jacob asked the small vampire.

"Sure it will," she shrugged. "I can't see Emmett's reaction yet but I can imagine." She smiled. "That's the only reason Bella and Edward aren't here really. I mean would you let _your_ fiancée fall in love with Emmett?"

"What?" Jacob shouted making Alice wince. "He," he jabbed a finger at Jasper. "Was going to make Bella fall in love with Emmett?" He roared.

"No you dimwit!" Alice shouted back. "You haven't been listening at all have you? Sit down," she said putting a hand on the wolf's arm and making him flinch. "I'll explain everything _again_."

**A/N: And this is where I leave you this time. No revenge yet but it will get there. Try and guess what Jazz's revenge will be before I put the next chapter up. Reviews are good. Please review. Thanks.**


	3. Important Update!

Hey everyone,

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, it's just I kinda have writers block. 

Well this is just a little post to tell you guys that my stories will be on hold for a while, that is until my muses strike me with something with something other than lightning and I get my laptop back from the computer store. (They took it cause it won't charge )

I do have a couple of other one-shots I might post if my dad's computer ever let's me, for some reason neither my sisters laptop or my dads computers like me, they're both against me.

When I do get around to updating my old stories I'll probably finish The North Won The War first, then maybe Jack's Brand New Adventure Parts 1 and 2, then my Robin Hood stuff.

Sorry about all the slow updates and getting peoples hopes up for a new chapter but I just can't get to it right now.

xVampirexBunnyx

P.S I'm thinking about changing my name, drop me a review or PM me and tell me what you think 


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